The other day I was
explaining when to use “I’m sorry” to young English-learners and thought it may
be interesting to share some around this phrase…
“I’m sorry” is one of the
phrases that we Japanese need to be careful when speaking English. Because “I’m
sorry” in Japanese (Gomennasai/Sumimasen) is often used in the sense of “Thank
you” in polite form. And quite often I see some Japanese people saying “Sorry”
when Gaijin-san holds the door for them. Yes, that’s the literal
translation but we should not say this when cashier staffs give us change or
someone gave us gifts…
For example… when we
receive gifts from the guest who visited us, we tend to say in Japanese “You brought us so
many gifts… I’m sorry”.
But this is literal
translation, so the real meaning of this sentence would be:
“You brought us so many
gifts… (I’m sure it must have been troublesome for you to do this and) I’m
sorry (for making you spend much time and money for us. But we appreciate your
kindness)”
We can instantly guess
these words in parenthesis and that’s why this “I’m sorry” makes sense. We show
the appreciation by acknowledging the effort the guest made for us. Somehow apologetic, but this is our
way to show the politeness, a part of our culture.
However this sounds weird
to non-Japanese and if we say its full sentence it would be creepier… Therefore,
this should just be translated as “Thank you for giving us many gifts” and it
can give same degree of gratitude in English.
It may be small thing, but
it could lead to big misunderstanding or problems… so I think it’s important for
us to know when to say “Sorry” and “Thank you”
…Anyway I think “I’m sorry”
in English is heavy words. At least heavier than Japanese “I’m sorry”. Of
course we use this as they really meant it and as same heaviness, but because
we often use this in a casual way, we may have less hesitation to say… I’m
guessing…
I hear quite a lot of “I’m
sorry to hear that you are sad” type of “I’m sorry” but I rarely hear “it was
my mistake and I am sorry” type of “I’m sorry” in English. Even when it seems
like necessary. Sometimes I get the impression that people are looking for
other words in order to avoid “I’m sorry” and then… I sense the heaviness of these
words.
And I think something
contrary to this is the phrase “I love you”. In most cases, “I love you” in
English means “I like you a lot” in Japanese (daisuki) and should not
translated literally as in “until the death (or someone new) tear us apart”
type of “I love you”. Otherwise you have no idea how many times you need to
make a vow... “I love you” in Japanese
is something very heavy, and we don’t even use this phrase between family members.
But in English, some people say “I love you” just because someone give a bottle
of coke… so this means “Thank you”…? Hmm… interesting…
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